the planet is fine, the people are fucked

i dyed my hair today and had a flashback to 7th grade.
when i was about 13, my mom volunteered to put blond highlights in my hair. (note: i am a naturally dark brunette) so we got a box, put this crazy cap on, and pulled some chunks through the holes in the cap. i looked like mickey rourke in the wrestler. i waited the allotted time, and washed the dye out. i got excited, thinking i was going to have this gorgeous head of perfect, blond highlights.
as i looked at myself in the mirror, i gasped. screaming "mom, mom, MOM!!!" i grasp at the 4" blond streak down the middle of my part on the top of my head. at this point in my life, i was a very, very, hormonal teenager. she burst into laughter, i burst into tears.
needless to say, i was dubbed "skunk" for the next 3 days my mom made me go to school before re-dyeing it (which turned it orange), and re-dyeing, and re-dyeing to return my hair
semi-normal looking.
i have always been cheap, dyeing my hair on my own. i can't warrant spending $70 to get my hair colored when i can do it myself for $7. and for all the times i've dyed my hair, you'd think i'd be pretty good at it by now.

let the re-dyeing begin.